


All I Want For Christmas.

by dreaming_wide_awake



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Clexa christmas, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-19 14:26:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13125585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreaming_wide_awake/pseuds/dreaming_wide_awake
Summary: Lexa is deployed overseas and won't be home for Christmas, until a seat comes up on a troop transport. Anya and Tris pick her up from the airport to surprise Clarke at Christmas.orIt's that time of year again, so here's my Lexa surprises Clarke for Christmas fic.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> There's the possibility that I have another part of this in me for tomorrow, if enough people want to read it. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, or whatever you celebrate. If you don't celebrate anything, I hope you have a good few days.

The build up to Christmas had been completely insane for Clarke, it always was. Ever since she had been a child the holiday season had been a massive thing in her house. The family would all get together, there would be arguments of course, but generally it was a good time for everyone. As Clarke had grown up, the entire family Christmas became a thing of the past, relatives would get too old to travel across country, and smaller family units were created as people got married and started families of their own. But in Clarke’s house, Christmas was still a big event.

This year would be no different, even though it would just be Clarke, her parents and a few of their close friends. Ever since high school Raven had spent Christmas with the Griffin’s, as had Octavia and Bellamy after their mom passed away. Now that had spread to their partners as well. There was going to be one person missing this year though, Clarke’s girlfriend Lexa. She had deployed to war earlier in the year, and wasn’t due home on leave for another two months. They’d already planned to skype each other on Christmas eve and Christmas day, and though that really wasn’t enough for Clarke, she knew that it was going to be harder for Lexa than it was for her. She was at home, surrounded by their family and friends. She was safe. Lexa was in the middle of a war zone, and even though the armed forces tried their best to make Christmas different than every other day, Clarke still knew that it wasn’t going to be anything like Christmas at home would be.

It had been strange for Clarke when, after they graduated high school, Lexa had signed up for the Marines. It wasn’t a surprise though, in all the time she had known Lexa she’d known that was her dream. Both her parents had served, as had her grandparents, so Clarke knew it was coming. That still hadn’t made it any easier for her. But they’d been together for a couple of years at that point, and were completely in love, so Clarke wasn’t going to stand in the way of what Lexa wanted to do.

Lexa’s older sister Anya had also planned on signing up, but ended up having a drunken one-night-stand in high school which resulted in her getting pregnant, she’d kept the baby and Tris was now almost 10 years old. 6 years after Tris came Aden. Lexa had been overseas when Aden was born, but had spoiled him rotten the first opportunity she had got. Since then Anya had sworn off men, and was now in a relationship with Clarke’s best friend Raven, which amused Clarke no end. Raven had always loved kids, but had always said the best part of looking after a kid was being able to give them back, now she was pretty much step-mom to two of them.

Christmas eve was one of Clarke’s favourite times of the holiday period, both her parents were off work, everyone would just hang out and watch crappy Christmas movies. They were currently getting prepared for the start of the movie marathon, which would probably end with Aden crashing out part way through the second movie, and Tris forcing herself to stay awake for as long as she could, but failing to make the last movie. It was always the same, and Clarke wouldn’t change it for the world.

As she stood and watched Tris and Aden argue about what type of popcorn they were going to have, an argument that Aden would win, she couldn’t stop the small smile playing on her lips. Tris was so much like Lexa, which Anya claimed she hated.

“Clarke,” Aden said, snapping Clarke out of her thoughts, “have you talked to Aunty Lexa yet?”

“Not yet buddy,” Clarke replied with a small smile, “she’s busy right now.”

Clarke really didn’t like lying to the boy, but she didn’t really know how to explain to him that she’d been on Skype at the previously arranged time to talk to Lexa only for the other girl not to be there. She’d waited almost half an hour and sent Lexa a text asking where she was. Lexa had replied telling her that something had come up and they’d have to talk later. One plus point of it being Christmas was that Lexa’s unit had access to their phones, it was like a Christmas treat.

Lexa had told Clarke that her unit was due to be staying on base over the holiday period, but obviously nothing is certain in war, something that Clarke had been very aware of. The first time Lexa had been deployed, they’d been talking one night on Skype, and a siren had sounded, bringing their conversation to an early end.

“I wish she was here,” Aden said, “it’s Christmas, she should be home.”

“She’s protecting ‘Murica,” Tris replied with a shrug, “that doesn’t stop just because it’s Christmas.”

“They should all make friends for Christmas.” Aden said.

“That actually happened once,” Clarke said, causing both kids to look at her, “in World War One, they stopped fighting for Christmas, gave presents and played a game of soccer.”

“Really?” Tris asked, “that’s pretty cool.”

“You remember what Lexa says about wars?” Clarke asked.

“The soldiers aren’t the ones causing the war.” Tris said with a nod, “the governments decide to fight, the soldiers are just the weapons they use. I hate politics.”

“What’s going on in here?” Raven asked, walking into the kitchen.

“We’re just talking about how much politics suck.” Clarke said with a shake of her head.

“Still no luck getting through to Lexa?” Raven asked, quietly enough so that the kids wouldn’t hear her.

“She said something came up and we’d have to talk later.” Clarke replied with a sigh, “it’s okay though, it’s fine.”

“It’s time’s like this that I’m actually glad that Anya didn’t sign up.” Raven said, “it’s got to be hard.”

“Harder for her probably,” Clarke said, “I get to spend time with my family, she doesn’t.”

“She’s on leave in two months, right?” Raven asked, Clarke nodding her head in reply, “so we’ll just have another Christmas then, it’s all good.”

“Two Christmases?” Aden asked, his little face lighting up, “that means more presents.”

“Christmas shouldn’t be about presents,” Tris said, causing both Clarke and Raven to look at her, confusion on their faces, “it should be about spending time with the people you care about. Some people don’t get presents, they can’t afford them, some people are even on their own at Christmas. The presents are not important, the people are.”

“How are you so smart?” Raven asked.

Tris shrugged before walking out of the living room.

“What about the popcorn?” Aden yelled after her.

“You win.” She called back.

“He always wins.” Raven said to Clarke, both laughing a little.

 

x-x-x-x

 

Lexa checked her phone again before closing her eyes and resting her head back against the seat. It had been 5 hours since she was supposed to talk to Clarke, doing so now would obviously spoil the surprise. A seat had come available on a troop transport back home, everyone’s name had been put in a hat and the winner would get to be home for Christmas. Lexa hadn’t expected to have her name picked, but she was glad she had. She hadn’t seen Clarke, or her family, in almost 6 months. It was things like that which made her question her career choice.

She’d always known what she wanted to do, and she knew all about the downsides of it too, and not just the physical dangers. Both of her parents had served, so she knew how hard it was to keep any kind of relationship going, she had known she would be fighting on two fronts. But every time she got home she knew it was worth it.

She’d text Anya about what time she was due in the country. She’d be landing at the base then taking an hour long connecting flight to get home, it was a long journey, one she would be making in the opposite direction a few days later. But she really wouldn’t change a thing. She had considered giving up the seat to a member of her unit who had just become a parent, and had yet to see their child, but when her CO told her that they were already going home, she obviously didn’t.

She really hoped that Anya, and probably Raven, would be able to keep their mouths shut about her going home. She knew that if Aden found out then he would definitely tell Clarke, and it wouldn’t be a surprise if she knew. Obviously, she knew that Anya would have to tell Jake and Abby she was going to be there, but she also knew that they wouldn’t tell anyone else. Jake would enjoy it way too much, he always loved keeping things like that a secret.

 

x-x-x-x

 

“How are there presents here from Aunty Lexa?” Aden asked from where he was busy looking at the presents under the tree.

The adults all looked at each other, Aden still believed that Santa Clause brought all the presents, so it was going to be hard to try and explain it to him.

“Well…” Anya started to say.

“Santa had to deliver them early to make sure they got here.” Tris said, not taking her eyes off the television.

Everyone was surprised, she had long since figured out that it was her mom who put the gifts under the tree, but she had no wish to destroy Aden’s belief in Santa.

“So, Aunty Lexa told him what we wanted?” Aden asked.

“Yeah,” Tris said with a nod, “you know that she wouldn’t forget about us at Christmas.”

“She never forgets about us.” He said with a smile, before he looked at Clarke, “can we talk to her yet?”

Clarke checked her phone again, she was waiting for Lexa to text her about their Skype session.

“Not yet.” She said with a soft smile and a shake of her head.

Aden let out a dramatic sigh before turning his attention to the television. Tris narrowed her eyes as she looked at her mom and Raven, who had both shared a look. She knew that look, it was the look they got when they were trying to keep something from them. She suddenly thought about what secret they were keeping, realising that maybe her Aunty Lexa might be coming home for Christmas. She also knew that it could be something bad that they were keeping from them.

She remembered that her mom had told her the story of when her granddad got hurt, and their mom hadn’t told them about it until she knew he was going to be okay, because she hadn’t wanted Anya and Lexa to get upset. But the more Tris thought about that, the more she realised that Clarke would already know if something bad had happened to Lexa, and Clarke hadn’t said anything.

Anya saw Tris’s brain working overtime and realised that her daughter was starting to figure everything out, she knew she needed to talk to her about it before Tris yelled about it.

“Tris,” she said, “do you want to help me get some more drinks out of the kitchen?”

Tris and Anya went into the kitchen, Anya closing the door behind them.

“You’ve figured out what’s going on, haven’t you?” Any asked.

“Aunty Lexa is coming home,” Tris said, “right?”

“She’s on a plane right now,” Anya replied with a nod, unable to stop the smile on her lips as Tris smiled wide, “but she wants to surprise Clarke, so we can’t tell her, okay?”

“Okay,” Tris said with a nod, “I can keep a secret.”

“Do you want to come with me when I go and get her from the airport?” Anya asked, Tris nodding quickly in reply, “okay, cool.”

 

x-x-x-x

 

Lexa checked the time as she grabbed her bag, it was almost 10pm, which meant that Aden and Tris should both be asleep by the time she got back. Though as it was Christmas she doubted that Tris would be sleeping, and she knew that Aden would be fighting to stay awake to see if Santa brought him what he wanted, though everyone had explained to him that if he stayed awake then Santa wouldn’t come at all.

She made her way through to arrivals, remembering how much she hated airports, and crowds of people. Christmas was always a really busy time at airports, especially Christmas eve with people finally making it home for Christmas. She was glad she’d been able to change into civilian clothes before her connecting flight, because she knew that so many people would be stopping her to thank her for her service and wishing her a Merry Christmas. She didn’t mind it usually, but she just wanted to get out of there as quickly as she could.

As she made her way towards the main doors she felt the cold breeze hit her, which made her pull her jacket tighter around herself, where she had been for the last 8 months it was constantly hot, so it was a nice change, but a shock all the same. Anya was supposed to be waiting for her with the car, she just hoped that her sister had managed to get away without too much fuss.

A small-ish body collided with her, making her jump a little. She looked down to see her niece wrapped around her midsection.

“Hey Tris.” She said, picking the girl up, “wow, you got big.”

Tris didn’t say anything, she just hugged Lexa tightly.

“She figured something was going on when Clarke couldn’t get hold of you,” Anya said, a smile on her lips as she rested against the car, looking at the scene in front of her, “I had to tell her.”

“Wonder where she gets her brains from,” Lexa said, walking towards the car, “because it certainly isn’t from you.”

Tris laughed as Lexa put her down before she was pulled into a hug by Anya.

“Welcome home asshole.” Anya said.

 

x-x-x-x

 

Anya and Tris had gone back inside, they had a plan, obviously. Lexa was going to call Clarke from outside, and then ring the bell or knock at the door. The pair of them sat back down, Tris on the floor and Anya on the sofa next to Raven. Tris couldn’t stop glancing at Clarke, who had a sleeping Aden on her lap. It wasn’t long before Clarke’s phone rang.

“Hey.” Clarke said, a smile on her lips as she answered the phone after checking the caller ID, “what happened to our Skype session?”

“Something came up,” Lexa replied with a sigh, “something that was really important, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Clarke said, “at least I still get to talk to you. How is everything where…”

Clarke was interrupted by the ringing of the doorbell.

“I’ll get it.” Jake said, moving to stand up, stopping as Anya shot him a look.

“Clarke needs to get it.” Tris said, shaking her head.

“Why do I need to get the door?” Clarke asked, her brow furrowed in confusion.

“Just do it.” Tris said.

“Fine,” Clarke said, shaking her head as she stood up, “you’re going to have to hang on a sec, Lex, apparently I need to answer the door.”

“It’s fine,” Lexa replied, “take your time.”

Clarke walked to the door, opening it to find Lexa standing there.

“But don’t take too much time though,” Lexa said, a smile playing on her lips, “it’s freezing out here.”

Lexa put her phone back in her pocket, and dropped her bag just in time to wrap her arms around Clarke as the blonde threw her arms around her.

“Merry Christmas, Clarke.” Lexa said quietly, as Clarke’s arms tightened around her.

“How are you here?” Clarke asked, not letting go of Lexa.

“An empty seat came up on a troop transport,” Lexa replied, “my name got picked out of a hat.”

“Next question has to be how long are you here for?” Clarke asked, this time backing away a little.

“I fly back on the 28th,” Lexa said, “so I’m here for a few days.”

“Aunty Lexa?” Aden asked, sleepily rubbing his eyes where he stood in the hallway.

“Hey buddy,” Lexa said, crouching down as Aden walked over to her, “shouldn’t you be in bed?”

“Are you really here?” Aden asked, poking Lexa in the cheek.

“Yep,” Lexa replied with a smile, “I’m really here.”

Clarke couldn’t help but smile as Aden hugged Lexa, the girl picking him up.

“I’ll get your bag.” Clarke said.

Lexa nodded a little before carrying a very tired Aden back into the living room.

 

x-x-x-x

 

After putting Aden to bed, and getting a shower, Lexa was now sitting on the sofa with Clarke. Anya and Raven sitting on the other side with Tris squeezed in between Anya and Lexa.

“So, how long are you home for?” Jake asked, handing Lexa a beer before he sat back down on the other sofa with Abby.

“Just a few days,” Lexa replied, “I fly back on the 28th.”

“How did you even manage this?” Abby asked.

“A seat came up on the troop transport,” Lexa said, “it happens most years, and they basically put everyone’s name in a hat and pull one out. It’s the only fair way to do it. Sometimes, there’s more than one seat, like this year, and special cases automatically get seated.”

“Special cases like what?” Tris asked.

“Well, this year, one of my unit is a new daddy,” Lexa replied, “he hasn’t even seen his kid yet, so he got seated first.”

“That’s a really nice thought.” Abby said with a smile and a nod.

“If he hadn’t, I would’ve given him my seat.” Lexa said.

“You would’ve given up your chance to be here for Christmas?” Tris asked, obviously a little hurt at that idea.

“I would’ve been coming home in a couple of months anyway,” Lexa said, “he isn’t due to be coming home on leave for another 5 months, and if anything happened to him out there and he hadn’t had the chance to meet his kid… I just don’t think I could’ve lived with that.”

“Well I’m glad you didn’t have to do that.” Clarke said, snuggling closer into Lexa’s side.

“Me too.” Lexa replied, softly kissing Clarke on her head.

 

x-x-x-x

 

Lexa had fallen asleep pretty easily, she’d never had any kind of problem falling asleep when she was at home, probably something to do with being with Clarke. She was woken up by a nightmare a few hours later though, and rather than lay awake in bed, and risk waking the blonde sleeping next to her, she got up and went downstairs.

She was sitting on the sofa, watching some rubbish holiday movie, when she heard little footsteps on the stairs. She knew, without question, that it was Aden. She and Anya used to creep downstairs in the middle of the night at Christmas to see if Santa had been, and it seemed that Aden now did the same thing.

“Has Santa been yet?” Aden asked, shuffling into the living room.

Lexa looked under the tree and saw that Anya had put all the presents under there already.

“Yep,” Lexa said with a nod, “you missed him.”

Aden pouted a little.

“You know that if you had stayed up, he wouldn’t have come,” Lexa said with a soft smile, “it doesn’t work that way. He only comes when you’re asleep.”

“One of the kids at school said that Santa isn’t even real.” Aden said, “he said that you can’t get around the whole world in one night.”

“Well,” Lexa said, “he’s wrong. You wanna know how?”

Aden nodded his head.

“He starts on the other side of the world,” Lexa replied, picking Aden up and sitting him on her knee, “Australia, New Zealand, Japan, places like that. Then he makes his way this way. It’s already daytime in Australia now, so he’s already been there. Because of time differences, and a little Christmas magic, it’s easy for Santa to reach everyone.”

“What about those people who have moved to a new house since last Christmas, or they don’t have a fire?” Aden asked.

Lexa remembered that she’d asked her parents all these questions when she had been a kid, and they’d always had answers. It always amazed her that they could answer her questions.

“Well, Santa knows where every child in the world lives, even if they move,” Lexa said, as Aden leaned back against her a little, “and for those houses that don’t have fires, he has a magic key that opens any door.”

Aden didn’t seem to have any more questions, and it didn’t take much longer for him to fall back to sleep. Lexa sat and watched the rest of the movie before taking him back upstairs and putting him back to bed, before she went and climbed back into bed with Clarke.

“Where did you go?” Clarke asked, resting her head on Lexa’s shoulder as Lexa put her arm around her.

“Couldn’t sleep,” Lexa said, kissing the blonde, “and I didn’t want to wake you, so I went downstairs.”

“You being home is the best Christmas present.” Clarke said, yawning slightly.

 “I love you.” Lexa said, a small smile playing on her lips as Clarke yawned yet again.

“I love you too.” Clarke mumbled before sleep once again took over.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas Day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like I said yesterday, this part might have been coming. I know it's short, but it's all I have right now. I have not had a good day at all. Hopefully you all have had a great day. Drop me a comment, let me know what you think :)

As Lexa slowly started to wake up, she could feel an uneasiness in her stomach, she felt like someone was watching her. Her eyes cracked open slightly, a small smile playing on her lips as she did when her eyes landed on Aden. The young boy grinned a little as he poked her nose.

“Merry Christmas Aunty Lexa.” He said.

“Merry Christmas buddy.” Lexa replied, rolling onto her back as she stretched, her brow furrowing as she noticed the light coming in through the curtains, “what time is it?”

“I don’t know,” Aden shrugged, “I’m 4.”

The look on Aden’s face made Lexa laugh as she realised the utter stupidity of asking Aden what time it was, which in turn made Aden smile as he cuddled up to her side.

“Have you opened all your presents already?” Lexa asked as she put her arm around the young boy.

“Nope,” he said, shaking his head, “mom said we have to wait till after dinner when everyone is here, we were allowed to open one though.”

“We had to do that when we were kids too,” Lexa replied, “I hated it.”

Aden giggled at Lexa’s words as if she had just shared some massive secret with him.

“Clarke said you have to wear this hat.” Aden said, reaching his hand down to his side and lifting up a Santa hat that had flashing lights on it.

“Oh really…” Lexa said, completely unimpressed with that idea.

“Yep,” Aden said with a nod, “and Jake said you have to wear your Christmas jumper.”

“I don’t have a Christmas jumper.” Lexa said, her brow furrowed a little.

“Actually,” Clarke said from the doorway, where she had watched the last few seconds of interactions between the two, “you do.”

“I do?” Lexa asked, a smirk playing on her lips as Clarke pulled a Christmas jumper out from behind her back, “that’s ugly.”

“That’s Christmas.” Clarke replied with a smile of her own.

“I’m starting to think I shouldn’t have come home.” Lexa said, laughing as Aden gasped, “I’m kidding buddy, there’s nowhere else I would want to be today.”

“Aden, your mom mentioned something about Christmas cookies…” Clarke said.

Lexa couldn’t stop the groan that left her as Aden literally climbed over her to get off the bed before he ran out of the door, yelling something about Raven not eating all the cookies.

“Do I really have to wear that thing?” Lexa asked as Clarke walked over to the bed.

Clarke nodded her head, laughing as Lexa wrapped her arms around her waist and pulled her down on top of her.

“Hey…” Clarke said as she positioned herself better, looking down at Lexa.

“Hey.” Lexa replied with a soft smile, “why didn’t you wake me?”

“Because you looked really peaceful, and I vaguely remember you complaining about having to be up at the asscrack of dawn every day,” Clarke said, Lexa nodding in agreement, “so I figured I’d just leave you sleeping. Aden obviously had other ideas though.”

“He’s a kid, it’s Christmas, he’s just excited.” Lexa said.

There was something in the way that Lexa was looking at her that caused Clarke to furrow her brow a little.

“What?” Clarke asked.

“I love you,” Lexa said, “a lot…”

“I love you too.” Clarke said, softly kissing Lexa.

The kiss was over way too soon when they both started laughing at Tris.

“You were right mom,” Tris yelled walking away from the open bedroom door, “they were being gross.”

“We should get downstairs.” Lexa said, brushing a stray strand of hair behind Clarke’s ear.

 

x-x-x-x

 

“Loving the hat.” Echo said as she walked into the living room, a smirking Bellamy walking in behind her.

“Bite me.” Lexa replied through a fake smile, causing Echo to laugh, a lot.

“Hats.” Aden said walking up to Echo and handing her a hat before handing one to Bellamy.

Lexa couldn’t help but laugh as the amusement drained from Echo’s face and she looked at Bellamy with a look on her face that screamed ‘do I really have to wear this’.

“Welcome to a Griffin family Christmas.” Bellamy said with a laugh as he put his hat on.

“It’s tradition.” Lexa said, “everyone’s wearing one, be thankful that you got out of the ugly jumper thing.”

“That is an ugly jumper.” Echo said with a nod as she looked at what Lexa was wearing.

“I know right,” Lexa replied with a huff of a laugh and a shake of her head, “apparently it’s been a thing since Jake was a kid. Though back then his mom used to knit everyone a jumper, guess it just stuck.”

“Families are… weird.” Echo said, sitting down on the sofa next to Lexa, “so, how long you home for?”

“Not long,” Lexa said, “I fly back on the 28th. I take it as you’re actually here this year, this thing between you and Bell is serious.”

“I think it might be,” Echo said with a nod, a small smile playing on her lips as she watched Bellamy spin Aden round, “which I’m honestly okay with.”

“He’s a great guy.” Lexa said, Echo nodding in approval.

“You weren’t saying that when he was hitting on Clarke in high school.” Raven said with a smirk as she handed the two of them drinks.

“That’s because in high school, he was a tool.” Lexa said, making the other two laugh, “but as soon as he grew up a little and realised that he wasn’t god’s gift to women, that changed.”

“Who’s god’s gift to women?” Clarke asked, walking over and sitting on Lexa’s lap.

“Me.” Lexa said with a grin.

“Modest too.” Clarke said shaking her head, leaning back against Lexa as she wrapped her arms around Clarke’s waist.

“You love me.” Lexa said, softly kissing Clarke’s neck.

“I do,” Clarke said with a nod, “sometimes I’m not really sure why though.”

“Yeah, me neither.” Lexa replied, making Clarke laugh a little, “but I’m really glad you do.”

“You two are enough to make me sick.” Echo said, shaking her head.

“You’re allergic to emotions,” Lexa said, glancing at her, “any kind of feelings make you sick.”

“Truth.” Echo said with a wink and a nod.

 

x-x-x-x

 

Later that day, after the food had been eaten, the presents opened, and more wine consumed, Aden and Tris were both fast asleep on one of the chairs in the living room and everyone was quietly enjoying watching a movie on tv, Lexa couldn’t help but take a look around her.

“Why does it always look like a gift wrapping store threw up when they’re done?” she asked.

“Because kids don’t know how to tidy up as they go?” Clarke asked in reply.

“What’s your excuse then?” Jake said, looking at the two of them, “I’m sure at least 20% of that mess is yours.”

“Well, I’m still your kid, so…” Clarke said with a shrug, making both Lexa and Jake laugh.

“I’ve been thinking…” Lexa said, making Clarke look at her, “my enlistment time is nearly up…”

Clarke nodded a little, she knew that because she literally had it marked down in the diary she had, part of her dreaded Lexa signing up for longer, but she always knew it was a possibility.

“I’ve missed too much,” Lexa said quietly, her brow furrowed a little, “with them, with you… I think I’m done.”

“I thought you were wanting to make this your long-term career…” Clarke said, “that’s always been your dream.”

“I know,” Lexa said with a small nod, “but dreams change, right? And I can still make a difference, just here. I can take up a training position or something, I don’t have to be on active duty.”

“Is that what you want?” Clarke asked.

“I think so,” Lexa replied with another nod, “we always talk about the future, starting a family, having little brats of our own… we can’t do that if I’m not here, well we could, but I don’t think I’d like that very much.”

“If you’re sure that’s what you want.” Clarke said, not really wanting to believe what Lexa was saying.

“Are you trying to talk me out of it?” Lexa said, a small smile playing on her lips.

“I just don’t want you to regret it.” Clarke said.

“I could never regret spending more time with you, Clarke,” Lexa replied honestly, “Ever. And Tris and Aden are growing up so damn fast, I feel like I’m missing everything… so much happens when I’m not here, and it’s fun hearing about it when we talk, but… I want to be here.”

“I love you.” Clarke said, Lexa’s reply getting lost on her lips as she softly kissed her.

**Author's Note:**

> I know I have a lot of fics that I need to update, I've been unwell (like in the hospital unwell), I will get round to updating when I can.


End file.
